Stage Mama?
I try very hard not to look like an exercise addict (working out in three sports, that can be tough), and I also fear seeming like a stage mother. So I smiled, then cringed under the surface of the pool when I saw Virginia—with whom I’d run six miles earlier that day—watching me swim laps with my seven-year-old, Lily. The 500-yard workout was Lily’s idea, but I probably planted the seed of it when I let her choose between staying at the nursery while I swam in the inside pool or instead hitting the outside pool to swim together.
It got me thinking about self-perception. I suppose Virginia just thought, “Oh, there she is playing with her kid,” but I felt that I must appear to be a monster, or at least a task master. Which is right? How seriously should we take our own self-images? They must form around a kernel of truth, pearls around sand.
And does it make it worse that Lily and I rode our bikes to the pool?
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That reminds me of my dad and I - we used to bike to go running on trails when I was younger (we still do when I’m home). All I can say is I am SOOOO glad we did/do all that stuff together…even if some people gave us strange looks when it was 100 degrees out.
In my opinion, your daughter having fun with you is waaaaaaaaay more important than what someone else thinks.
Comment by Julie — 7/22/2008 @ 2:43 pm
Sage,
I ran every day with Sarah Jane when we were on our family camping trip, not because I pushed her but because she asked me to run with her. When it comes to parents and kids and the whole question of “pushing,” I think AGENCY is the key. Whose idea was it to swim the 500-yard workout? Lily’s!!
Comment by joan — 7/22/2008 @ 5:16 pm
is it self perception or other’s perception of you that you are thinking about? you suppose virginia thought something… doesn’t matter what you do-someone is going to think you are nuts and someone else might just admire you. if you think you are a monster and a task master then that might be a problem but if someone else does… what does it matter? if you are happy and your family is happy and safe that should be all that matters. have a great time sharing your passions with your children!! they love spending time with mama when she is happy. your self perception and others perception of you are different things-one is important and the other is not.
Comment by chris — 7/22/2008 @ 9:24 pm